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Tag: marriage

Coupling Through Covid-19

A month ago, none of us could have expected to be facing a global pandemic.  As time goes on, the effects of increased anxiety, stay-home orders, loss, and financial instability creeps into our everyday lives.  Unsurprisingly it’s also having an impact on intimate relationships. Coupling and long term relationships require work under the best of…
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How to Build Trust

Once you’ve discovered what trust is and how it works, you can then learn how to build trust in relationships.  Hopefully examples from a classic Disney movie can help me explain how to build trust in another person. Please direct your attention to the movie Aladdin (or re-watch it to refresh your memory).  There are…
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What is Trust & How Does it Work?

Often I see couples and individuals coming in and saying, “We want to rebuild trust” or “I want to be able to trust them again/more.”  However, frequently these clients do not fully understand what they are actually asking for. When confronted with the question of “how do you think you do that?” or “what does…
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Love’s Evolution in Relationships

I see many couples and individuals who come to me saying things like, “the spark is gone in our marriage,” “I love him, but I’m not ‘in love with him’’, or “my feelings for her have changed over the years.”  If this resonates with you, you are not alone. In fact, these kinds of feelings…
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Love Like Cooked Spaghetti

When I’m in a session with a couple or an individual who comes to me to work on a relationship issue, it is not uncommon for one of the early sessions to involve discussing the 5 Love Languages.  I know, you’re probably thinking, “what is it with this woman and her obsession with this book/idea?!?!”…
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BOOK REVIEW: Mating in Captivity: Unlocking Erotic Intelligence by Esther Perel

BOOK REVIEW: Mating in Captivity: Unlocking Erotic Intelligence by Esther Perel

Pages:  244 Ideal Reader:  Sexually active individuals in long term relationships, Couples, Relationship therapists Ideal Issues:   Difficulty talking about sex/sexuality with significant other Differences in sexual desires within a relationship Wanting more passion and sex with a partner Changes in sex after marriage or children Desire to keep sexual passion alive in long term…
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Liberated by Love

Liberated by Love

It’s been a little while since I read Gary Chapman’s book The 5 Love Languages:  The Secret to Love That Lasts, though I talk about it frequently with couples and individual clients alike.  One quote from this book has been bouncing around my head lately.  That quote is, “True love always liberates” (p. 142).  I’ve…
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The Seven Principles that Make marriage work

BOOK REVIEW: The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John Gottman & Nan Silver

Pages:  284 Ideal Reader:  Individuals and couples in any stage of a relationship including “single and looking” to “road test your relationship before making a permanent commitment,”  “committed and want to bolster and protect what you have,” partners facing drastic life changes and challenges, and couples whose relationship is in danger of ending. Issues Addressed:…
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How to Foster Intentional Love in Relationships

How to Foster Intentional Love in Relationships

Gary Chapman proposes that there is an expiration date on “obsessional love.”  This love is that “falling in love” feeling complete with warm fuzzies and a desire so spend every waking moment with one’s significant other.  It is charged with emotion and chemistry. However, as suggested in his book, The Five Love Languages: The Secrets…
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The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman

BOOK REVIEW: The Five Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts by Gary Chapman

Pages:  203 Ideal Reader:  Couples (dating, engaged, married) who wish to enhance or improve their romantic/intimate relationship.  Applicable to all couples regardless of length of relationship, sexual orientation, or relationship makeup. Ideal Issues Addressed: Disconnected from partner Spark is gone in the relationship Feeling like you and your partner are roomates Feeling unloved and unsure…
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